Early Years at School (Chapter 2)

 

I continued to play sports in the hopes of winning approval from my dad, but it became a source of more tension for me and the harder I tried the worse I got. Around the house my mom was always around and acted as a buffer, but my dad was always angry about something either with my mother, his business and increasingly me and how I was disappointing him. I heard many conversations between them that my mother needed to stop with the babying and letting me dress up like a little girl. She stood her ground and told him that I was not like every other boy, no harm was being done and that in her opinion I enjoyed it. 

At the time I don’t know if I enjoyed it entirely, but I did love the attention I was receiving from my mother and I wanted to please her. For me it was an escape and it felt like I was escaping my reality and I did like the sensations of the soft fabric and ruffles of the dresses.

One particular Saturday was a horrible day. I had caused our baseball team to lose a playoff baseball game because I missed an easy catch.  After the game, my teammates made comments about “the baby not being able to catch the ball” and that “I preferred to play with girls”. I remember parents being upset and to make matters worse I peed my pants which caused players to laugh, and my dad had to come down from the stands and rather than console me I took me by the arm and marched me to the car.  During the ride home he lectured me and told me he would put an end to my bay and girlish behavior once and for all.

I started to cry, and my dad said those famous words,

“When we get home, I will give you something to cry about.”

When we arrived home my mom was not home, and my dad told me to take all my clothes off and put them in the washer. When I came back upstairs my dad was waiting for me at the top of the stairs, he took me by the arm and marched me into my bedroom. He sat on the bed and pulled me over his lap and without a word began to smack my bare bottom with his hand.  I let out a yelp because I had never been spanked before and I was shocked at how much it hurt.

I was kicking, struggling, and crying within a few smacks. I don’t remember how long the spanking was but I doubt it was more than 25 smacks, but I do remember that it hurt so much and he was done he told me to stand up and I put my hands on my bum because they were burning.

He told me that he thought I was wetting on purpose to get attention and that I probably like the feeling

of wet diapers. He was going to teach me a lesson and that I would not find them as pleasant today.  He left the room for a few minutes and when he returned, he put me over his lap again. I thought I would get spanked again but instead he spread my butt cheeks apart and I felt him push something against my bum. I struggled and clenched my bum tightly which earned me a smack. When he did that, I felt him push something inside my bum causing me to cry out struggle again.

I had no idea what he had pushed in but I could feel it get a little softer and being to move up. I tried pushing it out, but he clenched my bum cheeks together and warned me not to push it out. I recall being upset and crying but he ignored me. After a few minutes he told me to stand up and put on 2 diapers and a pair of plastic pants.  I was very confused because I thought he was mad that I wore diapers and now he was telling me to put them on. I hesitated because I had never worn 2 diapers at once and was not sure how to do it. My dad told me to lay down and he pinned on the first diaper followed by a second and then pulled up the plastic pants.

He told me that I would remain in my diapers until my mom returned home later in the afternoon and the bathroom was off limits.  He left and closed the door behind him, at first, I was not sure what I should do so I just put on some shorts and a T-shirt. I remember the bulkiness felt a little odd at first but then I started to like the feeling and especially how it filled out the plastic pants.  For the first little while I played and read in my room and then I decided I wanted to watch TV downstairs in the family room.  My dad asked if everything was all right and I told him I was fine. However, about an hour later my stomach started to rumble and feel a but uneasy and it was not long before I felt like I needed to go to the bathroom.  My mom always let me use the bathroom if I had to poo but when I got to the door my dad asked me where I was going.

I told him, he shook his head and told me that the bathroom was off limits. I started to complain, and he told me to be quiet. When I complained again, he took me by the arm and gave my bum a couple of swats. The thickness meant it di not hurt but the sound was loud. He led me to my room here he had laid out one of my footed sleepers. I was told to take my shorts and shirt off then put the sleeper on. I did as I was told and once it was on my dad zipped it up and then put some wire through the looks and twisted it tight.

He said to me know I could not remove the sleeper or my diapers and I was soon going to learn what it felt like to be a real baby.  I remember pulling on the zipper frantically and pleading with my dad to let me use the washroom like mom did. He just shook his head and left once again closing the door behind him.

 Had already wet my diapers a couple of times and I loved the feeling but now my stomach was starting to really gurgle and rumble. It was only mid afternoon, and I had no idea when mom would be home. I went looking for my dad and found him outside I the backyard I pleaded with him that I had to go poo.

He told me to hush up again and reminded me that if I wanted to act like a baby, I would be treated like one and that meant messing like a baby. I started to cry, and my dad told me to be quiet. This only made it worse, and I started crying louder so he took me by the arm and lead me to the house.  As he was taking me up the back steps, I felt horrible cramps and I filled by diaper with a large load of soft poop. I remember putting my hand behind me and feeling the back of my sleeper. My dad told me to go to my room and stay there until my mother got home.

It was a horrible feeling, I remember standing in my room with my legs spread because of the gross

feeling inside my diapers. By the time my mom got home I had pooped a couple of more times and I began to cry loudly when I heard her come home and begin talking to my dad. It was talking first but soon she was yelling at him, and she came into my room. She was exceedingly kind and reassuring, she quickly removed my messy diapers and told me to take a nice long bath to clean up.

When I got out the bath my mom asked me if I wanted to be rediapered or if I had had enough for now. I told her that I still wanted to be I was not so sure that I wanted to continue playing baseball on the team anymore.

That day was the start of many changes at home. My dad began to “travel” more again and it was not long after my parents separated.  While the stress and anxiety at home decreased things at school became worse. The saving grace was my friendship with Erin and being able to now avoid sports and do some other new activities that suited my demeanor more.