Teenage Years - (Chapter 4 Part 6 - Becoming Obsessed with Masturbation)

Like all boys once we hit puberty, we discover the joys of masturbation, and I was no different. However, when I was 16 I became obsessed with it and I was humping my pillow or playing with myself 4-5 times a day. Not 100% sure what brought it on but it was probably a combination of discovering my mom's lingerie drawers when she was not home as well as the Woodward’s, Eaton’s and Sears catalogues around our home were filled with pages of lingerie and lastly hearing and sometimes spying on my mom having sex. More on those topics later.

As I was in diapers every night and loved the feeling of the soft cloth against my penis I was usually masturbating in my diapers. I must confess I was loving the feeling of diapers and rubbing myself even as a little boy. At first, I would lay there and rub myself through the plastic pants; I loved the smooth feeling as well as the swishing sound of the plastic pants and would do this as soon as I went to bed and again in the morning in what was always my wet diaper which felt even more wonderful.

In the early days my mom caught me occasionally and she took a dim view of masturbation and would caution me that the Lord took a dim view of it as well. I would be more careful for a short period of time and do it quietly but it was not nearly as fun because I loved to furiously rub my cock so when my mom was not around I would do it over and over until she came home. Inevitably, I would be caught again and chastised or made to "write lines" quoting a verse from the Bible that she believed dealt with masturbation.

How I humped my pillow

As time went on, I discovered the joy of laying on my pillow in my diapers and humping away rubbing myself against the pillow but with this I started to become careless in my excitement and vigorous because now my bed was squeaking or banging against the wall which my mom obviously noticed.

I remember one evening I was humping away and after I had cum, I rolled off my pillow and was horrified to see my mom standing in the open doorway with her arms folded across her chest. To say she was upset was an understatement because she was mad in fact the angriest,

I had ever seen her.  She came in grabbed me by the arm and was

My diapers were this thick at night

yelling at me demanding an explanation. I just stammered and didn't say anything so for the first time in my life she slapped me across the face, took me by the arm and made me stand up, turned me around and swatted my bum a few times. It obviously didn't hurt because of my padded bottom but I was still shocked by it and especially her rant about how it was against our faith and family values. The next morning, she took me to see Pastor Eric and I received a strong talking to about how masturbating was against family values and sinful. I spent the rest of the days sitting at the kitchen table righting the lines: 

2 Timothy 2:22 – “Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.”

I remember the irony of it all because my mom then went out shopping and no sooner was, she gone did I put my hand between my legs and start rubbing myself.

My mom's solution to my masturbation was to purchase a Fisher Price Baby Monitor and put it in my room. I thought I was pretty smart by just unplugging it when I went to bed and started quietly humping the pillow or rubbing the front of my plastic pants then when I was done, I plugged it back in this seemed to work for a period of time but one day I came home and my bedroom door had been removed and also so was the monitor.  What I had not realized was that my mom had just moved the monitor from the nightstand then plugged it into a plug that was behind my bed and placed the monitor under my bed out of sight.

I thought I would just outsmart her by waiting until she went to bed then I would go back to my merry ways. Within minutes she was at my door, and I would be in trouble, this happened over and over and I just assumed it was because without a door to my room she could hear me. I had no idea it was the monitor that was signaling my naughty behavior.  I then started my jerking off during the day when my mom was either in the basement or her sewing room or in the yard but every time, she was at my door followed by a lecture and more lines. I had not realized that the baby monitor came with a little hand held receiver that she could have clipped to her belt on in her pocket.

One Sunday after church I was threatened with more severe repercussions to bring an end to my sinful behavior. Once again it was a visit to the Pastor, and he told my mother and I that the church condones the use of corporal punishment in situations of immoral or repeated poor behavior. I recall my mom was not keen on that idea especially because she really was not very strict with me my entire life. It was only this masturbating that she took a dim view on and was the first time she really got angry with me.  The situation was made more complicated because she and Pastor Eric soon were dating and he started to have more influence on her and on my lack of discipline.